Dawn

Not all of this may be appropriate. Seriously, Grandma & Grandpa Driver and Dad, stop reading this.

However, I am writing this post entirely for Dawn Taylor, because she seems to get a kick out of the weird things that happen to me. This was an entire day of weird things.

7:00 AM: I am dog sitting for the Liskeys. I arrive. A friend's car is there, it was there last night, but I didn't see him then. I again do not see him as I walk in. What do I see? The dog has pooped, nay, had diarrhea in three spots on the back porch. These are not small spots. These spots are the size of my dog. So I begin dry heaving and deciding on my plan of attack to clean these spots. Scoop it on a paper plate? Nope, no paper plate. Use the pooper scooper? Nope, I would have to go through the poopy back yard to get it. My friend? Nope, I would feel too guilty waking him up (assuming he is asleep and that is why I have not seen him). Paper towel? Best option I got. So, I begin to clean the mess up. Dry heaving the entire time. I finish. I disinfect. I leave.

10:45 AM: I have an appointment with a new neurologist. She is not taking any new patients, but seeing as how I am a freak of nature, she took me on. She then begins to explain in very simple terms all of the questions and problems that I have had about my concussion stuff that no one has been able to answer for me for years. Cause of multiple concussion? Nope, not doing it on purpose for attention. Nope, not just ridiculously clumsy. Nope, not simply not careful. Migraines, I spend most of my life with one. Therefore I am almost constantly in a fog and not as sharp as I would be at other times. Cause of ongoing concussion symptoms? Not, brain damage that won't show up in tests. Not, imagined symptoms I create to gain sympathy. Migraines, which share all of the same symptoms as the concussions. Memory loss, word choice, exhaustion, dizziness, all from Migraines. Am I going to be brain dead by the time I am 30? Survey says no.

3:00 PM I am running a blood drive at my school through the Red Cross for a big Purdue Project. The kick-off for the blood drive starts today. I am told Buddy (the mascot for the program) has been booked. I am called down to the office to pick up my special guest. There is the spokeswoman, and a big bag. I'm thinking, "Where's the guy who is supposed to be Buddy?" She's thinking and saying, "So who gets to be buddy?" I am trapped. I agree to be Buddy. What is Buddy? A giant blood drop of course. 5 foot in diameter. That's right I have to put on a bright red spandex unitard and then this huge blood drop on top of my head. To complete the look I have white gloves with only four fingers. Yup. I proceed to walk around the school and wave to all the kids. You should know. I have an overwhelming problem with being surrounded by kids. Now add a huge hot costume and forty kids all wanting a high five or to touch you. YIKES. Pretty much a nightmare. And the best part? I get to do it again tomorrow and Wednesday.

8:00 Private Ballroom Lessons.
Jai: "What dances do you want to learn besides the Waltz"
Me: "All of them, I want to be able to do any of them with an emphasis on the Waltz."
Mom: "Make her do the Tango, she hates it."
Jai: "You hate it?"
Me: "The more I have danced it the less I hate it."
Jai: "Well, I am not going to pressure you into it. You will have to think about it and come tell me when you are ready to do it. It's intense."
Me: "Ok" (mildly embarrassed)
Jai: "You’re essentially humping on the dance floor, so you let me know when you are ready to do it. Just come in and say, "Jai, I am ready to do it. Let's do it" and we'll do it.
Me: "Ok" (Thoroughly embarrassed)
Jai: "I mean, because you are essentially making a conscious effort to put your junk on top of her and keeping it on her, so you let me know when you are ready and we'll do it."
Me: "Ok" (Downright mortified)
Me: *Thinking* I am never going to learn to tango. I am never going to be able to walk up after this conversation and say, "I'm ready, let's do it." Oh well.





Yup. so that was my day. Seriously abnormal. Seriously random. Seriously over.