Stress

oddest at work conversation:

• Bonnie: So who do you dance with?
• Me: My instructor, Tim Dustin. He is incredible. He has more cuban motion than any woman.
• Bonnie (to others entering the office): Kim's partner is a little light in the loafers.
• Me: He is not gay.
• Bonnie: Sure.
• Me: He's married and has two children.
• Bonnie: So was I.

Yeee-ikes.

do people ever put their hands on your thighs while they are talking to you to emphasize a point? how weird does that make you feel on a scale of 1 - freak out?

• depends on the person.... i know scandalous. The average joe, not so much = 2. Old people. Yes. Always = Freak Out.

does Rachel Ray's scarf make you hungry for duncan donuts? it sure does for me!

• Um, no. My first thought without reading the attached article was that it reminded me of a dead animal. So. yeah.

who wants to get together and have a sibling swim-fest sometime soon?

• Swim fest? No thanks. I am going to do my best to steer clear of a swim suit this summer. Anything else though, I am game.

best-worst idea ever:
a) rocket chair
b) shotgun weddings
c) vaporizer (did you all get shocked as many times as i did when you were kids?)
d) spandex - I am a dancer. I love spandex, even though it looks horrible on everyone.



Yup, tomorrow at 2:00 PM. I will be dancing in public for the first time ever. Scary. Trying hard not to panic.

Sad

Ouch.

I hit an enormous pot-hole with my car today. It broke a spring. Which means I have to get my struts, spring, and casing repair. The estimate I was given was for $764.00. That pretty much wipes out the money I had in savings to continue dancing at the end of June when my package runs out. Ouch.

Questions

now that you're in the "real world" what is something you don't want to lose sight of? what did you want to put before you caved to what you should put?

• I feel an enormous burden has been lifted. I have more time and more money, so it is difficult for me to think about what I might lose sight of right now. The should answer is probably making sure I make time for reading my bible everyday. The real answer is making sure I take as much time as possible to dance. I have not gone as much lately as I did when I was working at Borders. Ironic, I know.

long weekend, eh? got any plans?

• I am off today, tomorrow, Sunday evening, and Monday. Today I am visiting Jerry Ross because I promised the kids I would. Tomorrow I am watching all five Harry Potter movies. Sunday, I am working in the morning and taking a post-church nap, like we always used to. Monday I am beginning my goal of watching all of my movies alphabetically.

what's something you thought you would hate, but grew to love? what's something you thought you would love, but grew to hate?

• I thought I would hate Spinach, but I love Carrie's Spinach salads. I thought I would hate Purdue, but I grew to love it.
• I thought I would love tanning again, but I hate it. I used to love it. It was warm and quiet and the perfect place to think, and the burn was worth it. Now, the fan makes it cold, I don't like having twenty minutes of thinking time, and the burn is soo not worth it.

think fast: mascot uniform or sandwich board?

• Sandwich board. Do you remember my adventure in a mascot uniform? (Buddy) Yikes.

do you think you're better than me?

• Only in ballroom dancing. I go that specific, because I think you are better at all other types of dancing.

Dead

Because two back to back gimicky post is a sign of a dead blog....

More

finish this sentence: with all the people talking about what they would change about their bodies, or the world or whatever, one thing i would absolutely not like to be changed is...

I sure do like the color of my hair and the expression in my eyes.



coolest country you're never going to go to:

a. Lichtenstein - i just like to say it.



what would you do for a klondike bar? EC. what does klondike even mean?

this makes me think of jeff dunham. "I'd kill you for a klondike bar." In all honesty, I wouldn't do much. Maybe open the freezer if there was already one in there. Mmm. I love those snickers things.




what do you think about most of the time?

sadly, 90% of the time I am thinking about dance. Either the people, the moves, the technique, the shoes, the dresses, whatever.



do you feel like you would ever be able to head-bang without the risk of serious injury?

Nope, headbanging=head injury




BONUS: where/who/what do you want to be in 3/7 years?

In three-sevenths of a year. I would like to be in Michigan on the beach.

Five

what are you new job duties going to be?

• Essentially, I will facilitate Sunday school for all ages and lead the children's ministry. There is a lot more involved, but that's the short version.

is there anything you will miss about Borders?

• I will miss the randomness. I liked seeing people all the time that I didn't expect to see and odd experiences.

when you get your own health insurance, do you think you'll go to the doctor a lot? i know i do!

• Go to the doctor sure, but I will likely not follow through on their orders for more work, cause that cost money, that I don't have.

did you jump up and down at all when you heard about the news?

• I did not jump. I was still bummed at the idea of not having insurance. I am only now beginning the jumping up and down process.

do you think we could have some hang out time this weekend? (read: are you dancing saturday night?)

• We could so have some hang-out time with Saturday night if you would coming back.

News

I got the job! I am going to call and officially accept it tomorrow! Yay!


Update:

I accepted the job this morning and was scammed by my first insurance company this morning and lost seventy-five dollars in the process. Crap.

Wednesday

Tomorrow is my interview with Staff Parrish. I am really hopeful. I am trying not be nervous. I work tomorrow from 10 to 7. My interview is at 7:30. So it doesn't give me too much time to worry. So that is good.


I practiced tonight in the studio. I am usually petrified of practicing in the studio, but Shawn made me stay so we could practice together. It is much less terrifying to practice with someone else. It would be better if there was a male to actually dance with. But having someone else there is still less scary. I will dance again on Thursday and practice before the group lesson. I am looking forward to the weekend of dancing again.

Weekend

Well, here's some dancing updates. I had a rough, yet great weekend.

On Thursday nobody stayed for the last class that Tim teaches so I got a free hour lesson with him. It was amazing! I would love to just take lessons with him everyday. He is a wealth of knowledge. And while he is really hard on me, I know I learn a great deal. We worked on some salsa, Viennese, west coast, and rumba. I haven't danced rumba with him in forever. I miss that dance.

On Friday, my lesson went wonderfully. I was in a great mood and I took my mess ups and his criticism in stride. We bantered more than we have in a long time. It was great. He was more supportive that he has been in a long time too. I was getting frustrated with the cuban motion we were working on. Then he was careful to remind me how long it took him to master it. FYI, Tim has the most amazing cuban motion I have ever seen.

So lesson went really well, we sit down for him to make notes of what we worked on and talk about it more. I ask him if we need to double up on lessons before the showcase. He then tells me we are not going to be ready for my solo for the showcase and that I can't do it. Ouch. Now, I am struggling to hold all emotion inside and bury it deep, so he doesn't see how greatly he has crushed me. He then tells me that people typically have about two or three months to prepare. He asked me 2 weeks ago what I wanted to do for it, we clearly had not enough time from that point to work on it then. I was mad that he had built up my hopes without any real chance of being able to pull it off.

So while he was talking to me, I was adjusting my own attitude. Instead of being heartbroken, I tried to focus on the positives. I get WAY too stressed out and focused on being good and lose the fun of dancing. When I allowed myself to think, I realized I was sort of relieved to not be doing the solo. It took the pressure off. I was going to have to buy another package to double up on lessons, it was money I had, but I was not looking forward to spending it so soon. I would also have to buy a gown for my solo. That was looking at being about $350 that I didn't really have especially on top of buying a new package. So that was another relief. He also told me that we can dance in the Pro-Am Freestyle dances. Which is a waltz, fox-trot, rumba, and hustle. We will work out a tentative routine, which is open to change due to other couples on the floor. So, I still get to dance, and dance more. There is less pressure. And while I still get upset when I think about not being good enough to do a Viennese solo, the positives out weigh it.

Now the part that made it truly great, I am not going to type. :)

Five

Thanks Cory

what needs to be done sooner rather than later?

• I need to put my clean clothes into my closet, before they get dirty from being on the floor.

have you ever felt like if something didn't happen, you were going to lose it? tell me a short story, please.

• Very much how I felt as I was finishing student teaching, waiting for my grades. If I didn't pass, I was definitely going to lose it.

you have to go someplace outside of the states for 2 months. where are you going?

• Japan? I like the images I have seen in the big cities. Looks fun and energetic.
• Florence? Sappy romantic reasons.
• Morocco! To see what Cory saw.

remember when we drew landscapes on notebooks and then had an animal cracker safari in Jacki's class? wanna do that again sometime?

• Yes, I do. Badly. Though it would lack something without the dirty looks from Eric.

talk to me about what you're learning about yourself. 2 things, one funny, one serious, please.

• Serious - It matters too much to me to be good at something. I was starting to stress about dancing because I didn't feel like I was getting good enough, fast enough. I am much better now about that. I am also drastically much more of a girly-girl than I ever assumed.
• Funny - I am mildly obsessed with celebrity gossip now, due to my job at borders and the constant supply of trash magazines on the break table.